People with this schema see themselves as special and superior. They believe they deserve privileges and rights that others do not. They feel exempt from the basic rules of reciprocity that govern human relationships and often try to shape or control others’ behavior to meet their own needs.
Empathy for others is limited. They act from self-interest, believing their wishes and opinions should prevail, regardless of how this affects people around them. They often show arrogance, competitiveness, domination, or insistence on getting their way. Common behaviors include imposing their opinions, seeking admiration, using power to control others, or displaying open snobbery.
There are several variations of this schema:
- Pure Entitlement – the “spoiled child” pattern carried into adulthood. There is no deeper emotional wound beneath the behavior; the main issue is lack of limits and overindulgence. Setting boundaries is central in treatment.
- Narcissistic Entitlement – a more complex form, rooted in Defectiveness and Emotional Deprivation schemas. Here, grandiosity compensates for deep feelings of inadequacy. This type is fragile; behind superiority lies vulnerability and shame. Treatment focuses less on confrontation and more on healing the underlying schemas.
- Dependent Entitlement – a blend of Dependence and Entitlement. Clients in this group believe others should take care of their basic needs—providing food, shelter, money, or emotional support—and become angry when this doesn’t happen. Therapy addresses both dependence and entitlement patterns simultaneously.
Examples of core beliefs:
“- I deserve special treatment
– I should be able to do whatever I want
– I am superior to others” (Bricker & Young, n.d.).
Origins of Entitlement / Grandiosity Schema:
“- The child was overindulged or spoiled by caregivers; the child did not learn to hear or tolerate the word “no”.
– Caregivers modelled a lack of control over emotions and impulses.
– Caregivers failed to exercise sufficient discipline and boundaries over the child; they did not impose or follow through on consequences.
– The child was made to feel inferior, unloved, or defective and learned to overcompensate by becoming demanding, aggressive, or superior.” (Bricker & Young, n.d.).
Therapeutic Goals
The goal is to help clients accept the principle of reciprocity—that all people have equal worth, rights, and needs. Healthy individuals understand that cooperation and mutual respect are essential in relationships.
Clients learn that no one is above the rules that guide social interaction. Respect for others’ boundaries, empathy, and emotional control are emphasized as signs of maturity and strength, not weakness. Ultimately, therapy aims to develop a balanced view of the self and others—one grounded in equality rather than dominance.
Core Treatment Strategies
These clients rarely come to therapy willingly. They are often referred because their relationships, careers, or reputations are at risk. The therapist identifies what truly motivates them—loneliness, loss, rejection, or fear of failure—and uses that as leverage for change.
Motivation must be anchored in consequences: the therapist repeatedly links entitled behavior to negative outcomes and reminds the client that meaningful change is necessary for lasting satisfaction and connection.
Therapeutic relationship
Work on interpersonal dynamics, especially within the therapeutic relationship, is crucial. The therapist helps clients recognize how their lack of empathy or misuse of power harms others and themselves.
Developing empathy becomes a central task—understanding others’ perspectives, recognizing emotional impact, and learning concern for others’ needs.
When clients are in relationships, couples sessions may help. The therapist teaches partners to set clear limits while helping the entitled client adjust expectations and share power more equally.
The therapist models mutual respect and equality, providing both empathy and structure. Entitled behaviors that appear during sessions—demands, dismissiveness, anger, or attempts to dominate—are addressed immediately and calmly.
Boundaries are clearly set to prevent re-creating the client’s childhood dynamic of indulgence without accountability. The therapist uses moments of self-awareness to strengthen growth—praising the client when they show empathy, humility, or self-restraint, and reinforcing those behaviors consistently.
At the same time, the therapist discourages focus on external status or superiority as a measure of worth, helping the client build inner value instead.
Cognitive Strategies
Cognitive work focuses on building a realistic self-concept. Clients learn to acknowledge both strengths and weaknesses rather than clinging to an inflated self-image.
They examine the belief that being special justifies special treatment, and they are guided to see that equality—not superiority—is the foundation of healthy relationships.
Therapist and client review past examples of entitled behavior and its consequences. Together, they identify patterns of conflict, loss, or rejection that resulted from self-centered attitudes. Cognitive techniques also target overvaluation of status, appearance, or achievement as measures of self-worth.
Experiential Strategies
Imagery work helps uncover childhood origins of entitlement. Clients may visualize scenes where they were overindulged or never faced consequences.
The therapist enters imagery as the Healthy Adult, confronting the Entitled Child and teaching the principles of fairness and reciprocity. In later stages, the client’s own Healthy Adult takes on this role, guiding the entitled part toward empathy and balance.
Behavioral Strategies
Training in assertiveness (to express needs without domination) and anger management (to handle frustration without aggression) supports behavioral change.
Challenges
The greatest challenge in treating this schema is maintaining motivation for change. Many clients enjoy the benefits of entitlement—it feels good to always get their way.
Because the schema is self-reinforcing, they often leave therapy prematurely once discomfort arises. The therapist must keep returning to the cost of entitlement: loneliness, conflict, and emptiness. Real motivation grows when clients connect these painful outcomes to their own behavior and begin to value genuine connection over control.
Resources:
-Bricker, D. C., & Young, J. E. (n.d.). An introductory guide to schema therapy: Adapted for use with the YSQ-R (Modified by O. Yalcin). https://doi.org/10.13140/RG.2.2.18302.46408
-Young, J. E., Klosko, J. S., & Weishaar, M. E. (2003). Schema therapy: A practitioner’s guide. Guilford Press.